MBTI and Dating!

Dating. I don't know about you, but the process of finding a suitable person to live with for the rest of your life is not something that I am looking forward to going through. For most people, there will be a lot of blunders and crushing failures along the way, as well as a lot of time and money spent. Some people don't find someone who is perfect for them and end up getting divorced! What if there was a way that you could quantify and compartmentalize somebody's personality to see how they tend to behave, and then compare that to how you behave in order to find a perfect match?

There is a way to do this, and it is through the MBTI test. This type indicator is very good at finding personalities that you will be compatible with. It draws slightly upon the common notion that opposites attract, but also upon the idea that you should find somebody similar to you. This boils down to a good indication of who your ideal partner should be. For example, say you are an ENTP like me. In that case, your ideal romantic partner would be an INTJ. Why an INTJ? Well, for starters, it is good to have one extraverted and one introverted partner. Studies have shown that this matchup works very well, as they cancel each other out and minimize conflict. Also, a partner who is J will counteract the indecisiveness and carefree attitude of the P partner, whereas the P partner will bring flexibility and compromise. The other two dichotomies, however, must be the same. If you match up with a Sensor and you are an Intuitive person, there is little chance that you two will ever truly be on the same page when communicating. This will lead to conflict and bad communication, which are two things that kill a romantic relationship. Also, you must either be both Thinkers or Feelers. A Thinker will often get annoyed by the apparent "irrationality" of the Feeler, whereas the Feeler will dislike the Thinker's occasional disregard for feelings. Again, this match is meant to minimize conflict and make sure you are on the same page as your partner.

If any of you enter the dating scene any time soon, try to make your partner take this test! It is by no means gospel, but if you follow the rules of the MBTI, your relationships could potentially improve drastically. This way, you could minimize the crashing and burning during the dating game, which would be very nice. Thanks for your time, and if you have any questions just shoot them into the comment section.

The Power Of Introverts!!!!

Since we are learning about TED talks in class, I decided to incorporate one into this blog, remembering one that I had watched a month or two ago. This is a talk about introversion and how it is received in our culture. You can watch the video here:

If you self-identify as an introvert, I applaud you. You often times have stigma working against you in the professional world, as well as in the social world. I remember one incident that I personally experienced in 10th grade that pointed to a dangerous stereotype of introversion. It took place in my driver's education class, which was full of kids that I was not friends with, nor that I had any semblance of desire to be friends with. Consequently, my usual extraversion didn't show its face--for most group projects or assignments I worked alone. I specifically remember one girl indirectly calling me creepy. After I reacted apathetically, she started saying things like "Don't freak out!" and "You aren't going to shoot up the school now, are you?". Apparently, at least to her, every quiet person is a ticking time-bomb of violence and psychopathy.

While I am not even an introvert myself, I have experienced some of the stigma first-hand. While hopefully most introverts aren't being accused of wanting to carry out a school shooting, there is a sizable amount of discrimination toward them, be it in school, the workplace, or in social circles. In this TED talk, Susan Cain talks about how a teacher's image of "the perfect student" would be a child who works well in groups and reaches out to other students. This is contrary to the fact that introverts get better grades AND score better on standardized tests. She also cites the fact that introverts are often passed up for leadership positions, even though they are (usually) more focused, more detail-oriented, and less likely to take ill-advised risks.

One thing that I thought was interesting was when she brought up the time frame of the rise of extraversion. In an agricultural society, we worked with the same set of people our entire lives: family, close friends, and neighbors. In this setting, one had no need to be extraverted, and in fact, might benefit from introversion, since large parties and gatherings were almost non-existent. Extraversion did not really become a quality until people started moving to the city, in turn coming into contact with hundreds of people a day. When this became the norm, people who could navigate social settings and converse relatively easily were in higher demand.

In closing, I would like to say that many of my closest friends are introverts. I've always liked them because, unlike me, they think things through before they do them. My one introverted friend always points out the logical inconsistencies in the remarks I make--inconsistencies that I surely would have filtered out had I just shut up and thought for a second or two. I think that it is a shame that they are still the subject of bias in today's society. In my experience, introverts are some of the most adept and interesting people in the world.